My siblings

Have been for the most part very destructive this year.

They have hurt themselves and I want to have little to do with many of them.

That's the beauty of being anonymous on the internet. You can vent and give us juicy details without causing trouble in your personal life. So spill it if you want. That's what I did with my divorce thread.

Our father died about 4 months ago.
He made significant late changes to his will and the split is inequitable.

It has caused massive disruptions in an already disfunctional family.
There were all sorts of aggressive abusive letters sent and false baseless allegations made.
Many lifelong relationships are broken beyond repair I believe.
Last night I blocked my sister from facebook.

Just because someone is blood doesn't necessarily make them 'family.' I found that out the hard way and cut off the dead wood.

Who was the big winner in the will war?

One older brother and my younger brother. Not me

Younger brother bought Dads house at a significantly reduced price before he passed away. That was all 'fair and above board'.
It would have been nice had the discounted price was reflected in the will.
But it was Dads money to do with as he saw fit.
there is not legal reasons for a will to be equitable among family.
He could have left it all to a charity, burnt it, threw it into a river.
It was his.

I'm glad I had a very good Father. I miss him.
Used to ring him a lot.

I feel for anyone in these circumstances.
My experience has been that family divisions which may have
been "tolerated" over the years are suddenly exposed dramatically
when a testator dies and the contents of the will are known.
Those divisions among family members are never repaired.
They have probably been there since day one.

I could be wrong, but I think my brother shares my attitudes on inheritance and our parents are being careful not to play favorites to keep the family at peace.  Either way, it's my parents money.

My dad and his siblings had some drama over their inheritance from my grandmother.  My dad and his brother were hosed over my grandmother's allowance that the sisters could continue to use the house.  Twenty five years later, they are still using the house and my dad and his brother haven't seen a penny.  My aunts almost let the property get taken over not paying taxes.  My dad and his brother have a lien against the house, but it's for their share of the value 20 years ago and it's not much in today's dollars.  My dad and his brother are worth 10 times over the aunts and they are much better parents and people as well.  I don't hate my aunts, I just don't have much respect for their judgement and values.  Most of their kids are trailer trash.  The only cousin we see regularly was raised by my grandmother because my aunt wasn't responsible enough.  She gave up 2 kids for adoption as a teenager 60 years ago.  I met one of them at a family reunion 15 years ago.  He seemed like a nice guy.

My mom and her siblings have always gotten along well and we are a pretty close and supportive family. I still see all of my cousins fairly often.

I have always found it difficult to get my head around the
inequalities I have seen in several wills...

Crusader wrote:I could be wrong, but I think my brother shares my attitudes on inheritance and our parents are being careful not to play favorites to keep the family at peace.  Either way, it's my parents money.

My dad and his siblings had some drama over their inheritance from my grandmother.  My dad and his brother were hosed over my grandmother's allowance that the sisters could continue to use the house.  Twenty five years later, they are still using the house and my dad and his brother haven't seen a penny.  My aunts almost let the property get taken over not paying taxes.  My dad and his brother have a lien against the house, but it's for their share of the value 20 years ago and it's not much in today's dollars.  My dad and his brother are worth 10 times over the aunts and they are much better parents and people as well.  I don't hate my aunts, I just don't have much respect for their judgement and values.  Most of their kids are trailer trash.  The only cousin we see regularly was raised by my grandmother because my aunt wasn't responsible enough.  She gave up 2 kids for adoption as a teenager 60 years ago.  I met one of them at a family reunion 15 years ago.  He seemed like a nice guy.

eeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwww, not so good