The Crabs!

Well, you peeps know we're kinda famous for da crabs down here in Louisiana.  I hear Chesapeake Bay Crabs are even sweeter!

Close to 50 years ago, my mom hauled me down to her sisters house.  My aunt had 4 boys. The oldest was 2 or 3 years older than me. I'm guessing I was 13-14 years old. In Louisiana you could a get a driver's license at 15 at the time.

Well my cousin "junior" was old enough to drive . One of the first things he did in the early seventies was drive to the nearest mafia owned bar for a drink. Absolutely no law enforcement was involved in those days. They didn't care if you were 16.

Well, in those places there were dancers(known as go-go girls in those days. Long before crack and meth)
But even a condom would not have helped him. Pauvre bet. Lol

He caught "The Crabs" real bad! Not to be confused with "da crabs". Da crabs is real good!

We went into the garage and his younger brother suggested he pour some gasoline on his pubic area to kill them . Lol.
He said he would give it a try.

Man, he was in a bind. He was not about to tell his mom!

He took off his shoes. Then, his socks. Then, his pants and underwear. All he had left on was his shirt.

He took the gas can and slowly poured gasoline around his pubic hair.
Everything was ok.

Until the Gasoline ran down to his asshole!
He started jumping and hollering in the garage enough to wake the dead. Neighbors were coming out of their houses!
Then, he lit out of the garage running around the neighborhood with just his shirt on.

My mom and my aunt came out of the house with great concern  and saw that . They approached me first and asked me what was wrong with junior.
Being the responsible person I am,  i just Seargant Shultz them with I know nothing.

How the hell ya gunna tell your mom and aunt that he poured gasoline on his d@ck!? But his asshole caught fire?

I never seen anything like that before or since. But I still lmao to this day.

When I got to "lit out" I thought ohhh noooooooooo!!

Luckily he wasn't that dumb.

Red Lily wrote:When I got to "lit out" I thought ohhh noooooooooo!!  

Luckily he wasn't that dumb.

But he was that dumb.
He's still with us. Bad heart and his woman left him after 30 years but I never kept up. A great guy who takes care of his mom and she's a cupla years older than my mom.

Next oldest is a 62 year old crack head. Grand daughters and great grand daughters are not allowed to visit their grandmother.

Third oldest caught a well-deserved bullet . A habitual thief and drug addled freeloader.

The youngest one made good in life. Two wives(Not at same time) and 5 kids!
He lives about 500 yards from his mom and those kids are forbidden to go there when they can walk there.

I don't know and I don't want to know why the grandkids can't visit. But I think it has something to do with the old husband who passed away a few years ago. He was a no good, abusive motherfucker. No doubt.
I think they blame the mom for not standing up to his abuses.

But there's a lot more to the story they may not know.
But Hawk knows. And it's not a pretty story.

It's really sad that things like this happen but if there is abuse suspected kids need a voice and protection. It happens everywhere all the time. Sometimes people know and sometimes they don't, but should.

Red Lily wrote:It's really sad that things like this happen but if there is abuse suspected kids need a voice and protection.  It happens everywhere all the time.   Sometimes people know and sometimes they don't, but should.

Um in the 1940-50s if a drunk put a gun to your head and you were 4 years old and told you they were going to kill you after they saw their mom beat to death by the same man , what would you do?

Probably pee myself or worse!

Chesapeake Bay Crabs are really good. Often you will see people selling fruit or seafood out of truck on the side of the road. It's a common thing in Maryland. When I was in college I was driving near campus and I passed a pickup on the side of the road selling seafood. No big deal. there was a sign that read "CRABS". Again no big deal. The thing is there was a you lady sitting next to the sign with her legs up on a cooler spread wide open...

Booman wrote:Chesapeake Bay Crabs are really good. Often you will see people selling fruit or seafood out of truck on the side of the road. It's a common thing in Maryland. When I was in college I was driving near campus and I passed a pickup on the side of the road selling seafood. No big deal. there was a sign that read "CRABS". Again no big deal. The thing is there was a you lady sitting next to the sign with her legs up on a cooler spread wide open...

If you can help it , never pass up fresh crabs!

:cyclops:

Best crabs were up on the California coast, I want to say the Shelter Cove area, but I may be wrong. Straight from the cooler into the pot, straight from the pot to my bibbed and sleeve-rolled self, a small pot of melted butter on one side, and a 5 gallon bucket for waste on the other.

As to the other kind of crabs, I'll pass on first hand knowledge. Gasoline, of all things, I just flinched, lol....